Speaking Up

In almost any situation its difficult to speak up when you know that doing so can make people upset, cause them to dislike you, or think you are being anal retentive (to put it nicely). But, in a hospital setting, in which it is infinitely more important to speak up, it is also much more difficult, as you can risk upsetting people you may see or interact with regularly.

I ran into this problem quite a few times while my son was in the hospital. One issue that came up several times was hygiene and hand washing specifically. Before my son receive his transplant we knew he couldn't get sick or if a heart was found during that time he wouldn't be eligible. So we were extremely cautious about staying away from sick people, washing our hands and using sanitizer, and wearing a mask if we thought there was a remote chance we were coming down with something. As parents, it was the least we could do, but we also expected no less from the medical staff that took care of our son daily. 

Most of the staff did not let us down, they washed their hands or used sanitizer when they entered his room, but a few people did not. They may have washed their hands or sanitized when they entered the unit, but not when they entered Laith's room, and in his situation I was very worried and unwilling to give anyone the benefit of the doubt. That didn't mean it wasn't difficult to speak up, especially when I could tell some of the people I asked to wash their hands were annoyed, but I had to keep reminding myself that it wasn't a popularity contest, it was literally my son's life that was at stake. 

I was always polite. I would generally say something like "I'm sure you washed your hands when you came in, but I'm super anal, would you mind washing your hands again to ease my mind?" I was hoping by saying that they would understand that even if they had washed their hands it would make me feel better if they did it again. There are of course times when a simple "Can you please wash your hands first?" is appropriate, such as when I saw a technician drop his pen a few times and pick it up from the floor and then, without washing his hands, wanted to check on my son. Or when a fellow sneezed into her hand and then wanted to check on Laith without sanitizing first. Absolutely not! At those times, it is apparent that they didn't take the proper precautions and I had to speak up.

I still struggle with speaking up at times, and have to mentally rehearse what I'm going to say in some situations, but after all that we've been through I realize that my family's well being is more important than stepping on a few toes, no matter how intimidating those toes may be.